Understanding Anxiety- When Helpful Worry Becomes too Much

In my work with children, we often talk about how all of our emotions send us messages—signals that are worth listening to. One of those emotions, anxiety, can be a powerful motivator. Think about the days leading up to a big test, presentation, or job interview. A little anxiety in those moments can help us prepare, focus, and follow through. In those cases, you might even thank your anxiety for giving you the push you needed.

But sometimes anxiety shifts from a helpful tool into a constant, overwhelming presence. It becomes overly focused on protecting us from what might go wrong—worries about job loss, illness, or other uncertain future events. When these “protective” thoughts start to interfere with daily functioning, they may be signaling something more serious.

What Is Anxiety?

Anxiety becomes a concern when it’s no longer motivating us toward healthy productivity, but instead keeps us stuck in worry. In those cases, anxiety might be trying to tell us we’re overwhelmed, that we need more support, or that we’re dealing with deeper fears.

Common Symptoms of Anxiety

Symptoms can vary by age and severity, but the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) defines the following as key criteria for Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD):

• Excessive anxiety and worry (apprehensive expectation) occurring more days than not for at least 6 months, about a number of events or activities (such as work or school).

• Difficulty controlling the worry.

• Anxiety and worry are associated with at least three (or more) of the following six symptoms, present for more days than not over the past 6 months:

  • Restlessness or feeling keyed up or on edge

  • Being easily fatigued

  • Difficulty concentrating or mind going blank

  • Irritability

  • Muscle tension

  • Sleep disturbances (difficulty falling or staying asleep, or unsatisfying sleep)

If you or your child is experiencing several of these symptoms, it might be time to explore new strategies for finding calm and balance.

Treatment Options for Anxiety

The good news? Anxiety is highly treatable. With the right support, many people learn to manage or even overcome their symptoms.

1. Therapy

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is one of the most effective, research-supported treatments for anxiety. CBT helps individuals identify and change unhelpful thought patterns that fuel anxiety. It also incorporates calming techniques like breathing exercises and mindfulness to regulate the nervous system.

2. Lifestyle Changes

Making intentional changes in daily life can significantly reduce anxiety. Consider adjusting:

• Exercise routines

• Nutrition and hydration

• Work-life balance

• Sleep hygiene

• Alcohol and caffeine intake

• Relationships and social support systems

3. Medication

In some cases, therapy and lifestyle changes alone aren’t enough. When this happens, medication—prescribed by a psychiatrist or primary care provider—can offer meaningful relief. Medications can help regulate brain chemistry and create a more stable emotional foundation for healing and growth.

Final Thoughts

Whether it’s occasional nervousness or a chronic struggle with anxious thoughts, anxiety is something many people experience—and you’re not alone. If anxiety is interfering with your daily life or preventing your child from thriving, don’t hesitate to reach out for help. With compassionate support and evidence-based tools, relief is absolutely possible.